A desperate plea for man purses

At this very moment, all around the world, untold numbers of young men are aching with desire — for a man purse. If only they could carry one without being thought . . . you know, “sissy.” Or worse, unfashionable.

Don’t believe it? The private writings of Winnipeg teenager Michael Remis provide a small window into the quiet desperation of this seething crowd of would-be male purse carriers. “My biggest fear,” he confesses in one post, “is walking around with sideburns that are uneven and unequal.”

A lonely voice in fashion’s cold winter wilderness, Remis pleads urgently — amidst musings on Olympic hockey and bus-passenger safety — for some sort of release:

man purses, when are they going to become a fasion trend. please. i am waiting for it. right now i am surviving on these huge pockets in the front of my jacket. can’t the man purse just hop on. think of all the stuff i need to carry around, pockets, just don’t do it anymore. ipod, headphones, sunglasses/the case, wallet, cellphone, yahtzee (everyone should have one of these, more than a cellphone, a handheld game, wow, whenever you are bored or have some waiting time, i.e. a doctors office or during class or on a bus, they are great to pull out), digital camera? pda? really, man purses, they need to be in. or jackets with an excessive amount of pockets. but then im [in] dunbar in the summer. i hate those nike shorts that dont have pockets in them.

Please. I am waiting for it. Right now I am surviving . . . They need to be in. Can’t you feel the passion? the yearning? the plaintive gushings of youth? Please, fashion gods, have a heart!

2 Responses to “A desperate plea for man purses”

  1. Clear the runways — man purses set for takeoff - The Satchel Pages: Home of the Man Purse Says:

    [...] « A desperate plea for man purses [...]

  2. February was Man Purse Month - The Satchel Pages: Home of the Man Purse Says:

    [...] “Can’t the man purse just hop on?” The inner longings of a new generation of would-be man-purse toters . . . and their possible redemption on the runways of New York. [...]

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